Posted on: Wednesday, December 02, 2009
Posted at: 1:34 AM I've been blogging everyday for the past few days, have so many emotions cooped up in me.
Truth be told when I think about it I still feel a little disappointed though I know it's over.

I really don't care how others think of me. But I just find it amusing how people can label me even before meeting me, even before they actually talk to me or get to know me.
(I don't need any preachings about that's how I portray myself to people now so don't bother okay)
It's funny how those comments that didn't use to bother me now comes and makes me feel like it'll spoil my relations with people. I don't know.
Is it true that if one really cares and knows how I am like as a person, they won't be bothered about what others say of me? If people continues to say "Hey she's like such a _____ kinda person why are you still hanging out with her" and shit like that, can I truely believe that the person will defend me, will trust that I am actually not like that? Can I believe that the person will not be swayed by all these comments?
I've been hurt like that before, and I really don't wanna be hurt like this again. They say once bitten, twice shy.

Met up with Momo gang today and we had a HTHT. Somehow I revealed about not getting hurt again and thus building a wall around you that sort of logic, and to be always prepared that you'd get hurt so that you won't feel that much pain.
It's a really sick way of thinking, and seriously tiring.
But can I really let my guard down, and risk getting hurt again?

I don't wanna talk about this anymore, not here anyway.
But this is really one of the most hurtful thing someone can say to me.

-

Anyway it had been a great HTHT session and I guess we realised how much we understand each other, like finally, we've finally talked about things like these.
It was a great feeling.
I'm just glad I have friends that I can rely on. It took me 18 years to find them and realise that. I'd grab hold of them forever man.
Love those darlings. (: