Posted on: Sunday, November 29, 2009
Posted at: 7:33 PM In I think less than 3 months I've been hurt by people that mean something to me.
Not too long ago I've been called scheming by a very close friend (but it's over now thank god), and today I just realised that someone who matters so much to me thinks that I am a loose girl, that I party all day and night and get high on alcohol.
This matter gonna be resolved soon but still it won't heal the cut that runs so deep in my heart.
Is this what people think of me, seriously? Is this the first impression that people have of me? Because that's not who I am. I am not someone who does that, heck I never even stepped into a club before.
I really can't believe it.
I can accept it if other people thinks of me in that way, but when someone who is supposed to understand you thinks of me that way, it just hurts. To the bone.

I know I was at fault but let me rant okay. I feel so hurt.
When that person told me it felt awkward talking to me now, I had to close my eyes so tight so I wouldn't cry.
When I realised this was the impression I gave to that someone, I just felt shattered.
My fault, yes. All of it's my fault.
But still... Oh man it's like logical thinking vs emotions now and it's a raging war.

Seriously why should people judge me through what I blog about? Do you personally know me, to spread what fucking shit about me? No more than half of you who reads my blog don't.
Guess what I found out that there are many others who reads this space of mine too. And all you people just judge me. Most of you don't even KNOW me.

-

All things said, I think I should change.
Let time prove to you foolish people that I am NOT THE GIRL YOU THINK I AM.

And to all the people I don't know that are reading this, stop being a busybody. Go get a life.

And to this friend that I'm talking to now. Thank you 'cause you made me feel much better despite being like super fierce.

Dinner time!